Heatherisms
Ok so you want to hear some funny things from my past? You’ve heard of Bushisms? Now I bring you Heatherisms. These are three of the most popular and most well known phrases I have said in my past to my family. The ones my family will never let down. The ones that are brought up at almost every family get together. And I’m sure soon enough my Brandon will be hearing about them too.
Let’s start with I believe is one of the first, funniest and craziest one…
Alla-walla-kiki: This phrase is translated to “All I want is Chicken” This was when I was very young shortly after being placed in my adoptive parents home. My now mom asked me what I wanted to eat for dinner. And “Alla-walla-kiki” is what came out of my mouth. She asked me again and again but that is all I kept saying (and I was getting frustrated). So finally while we were in the store she asked me to point out to her what it was that I wanted. So I pointed to some chicken. Some how some way she was able to translate it.
Now the other two will not have to be translated but are still funny till this day.
Living in San Diego and our Grandparents living up in Bakersfield, CA we would drive up (5 hour drive) there every summer and us kids would stay up for a couple weeks. Well we had a old beat up Ford Pinto (lol, anyone remember those?). We had no air conditioning in the car, and there was 6 of us sometimes even more all cramed in the car (before the days of the law requiring to wear a seat belt). And I would yell out “I’m hot and I’m crowded” and what do i hear back in return “No shit, Heather” as everyone in the car is hot and crowded going throught the California grapevine during the summer.
Another good one Is I think back in 1983-84? We had to defrost the fridgerator. So we placed all the food in some ice chest that we had. During that time I came in from playing outside to get a drink of milk. Opened up one of the chest picked up the milk and noticed it was squishing the sausage. For some unknown reason though I couldn’t think of the term Sausage so I read the package and it says pork links. Not sure why I was even concerned about this I blurted out “Who put the milk on the porky links?” (in like a southern accent) they all started laughing so loud. At the time I was upset cause they were laughing at me, but now I laugh at it every time I think of it, including now. It’s probably not as funny reading it as it is to hear it. So just trust me it was hillarious.
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LOL
I hate being hot and crowded.
Those are awesome…most of my lines come from being drunk:burp:
If I could only remember the things I said when i’m drunk….mostly I just ramble on and on about the same stuff…
I know I once yelled at the top of my lungs “I’m drunk, in the middle of Pearl Street and I have no bra on!” at like 3am
This reminds me of some comments from my mother, Gine. Hear are a couple of Gineisms.
I had a poster with a picture of Einstein with the quote from him “Great spirits have always encountered opposition from mediocre minds” My mom cane in the house and read it. Her response was “That’s not necessarily true!”. My unspoken response was, point proven!
One time when we were down on the docks where my dad lived on his sail boat, my mom commented how bad it must be for the water for all these people living on their boats. I thought great, my mother is actually starting to think enviromentally, after all this was the woman who thought recycling was a hoax just to make us feel better. I was thinking that she was concerned about toxic chemicals being leaked or dumped, or about no-bidegradable garbage getting into the water. Then she said “You know, those men don’t always walk up to the restrooms everytime they need to pee”. She actually though a little pee was what was so harmful! I’m sure the sealions get out and use the public restrooms each time they have to go!!!!
LMAO too funny Marlene… Your mom is a trip… Im sure you can think a dozen more…
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