A New Chapter Opens
Since the news on Tuesday night from Mohcine I haven’t cried, yelled, begged or had a breakdown once. Once or twice I have I have gotten close to sheading a tear or two but it hasn’t happened yet. I was asking Angela, is there something wrong with me for not crying for the past 4 days? It’s so not like me not to. I’ve always had horrible times with breakups. I guess I have just grown up alot since my last breakup. And I must be strong and concentrate on my Brandon. If it wasn’t for him I really don’t think I would be handling this the same way. Maybe deep down this is what I wanted, maybe subconciously I was ready for it to end. But this doesn’t mean that I don’t still love Mohcine. I called him up today and told him, “Some say I should hate you, but I don’t. I may be dissapointed, and sad but yes I still love you.” He said he was glad that I didn’t hate him, After all how can you go from loving someone to hating them over night. To me, Hate is a very strong powerful word which I don’t like to use. I only think of one person when I think of the word hate and that is Jes as much of you know. Guess I’m alot stronger then I thought and surrounded by lots of other strong women.
Today I started to look at price ranges on apartments. I hate the idea of going back to an apartment after about 6 yrs of living in a house but it’s what I have to do. Mohcine also said he would help out on the rent for the time that he is still here, so i’m very thankful for that. It will be so weird for me, because I have never lived on my own. I’ve always lived with family or friends or of course my husband.
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It is good to look at the positive. And how your son will witness how you deal with it. He will be more ready for all those independent cute girls out there!
You are going to rock girl!
Good for you.
Yeah I don’t believe you can go from love to hate…if you really hate someone you probably never loved them to begin with.
Well, Heather-
It looks like a new chapter of your life is about to unfold. How you make this new begining happen is up to you.
You have a lot on your plate but you are strong and can make things happen. As to why you haven’t cried..maybe the thoughts you expressed have some truth. Look into your heart my friend…and return to you. I’m here as a supportive friend to you. I’m sorry this has happened..yet…I also believe that…Things Happen for a Reason!
Wishing you strength, confidence, and happiness for you and Brandon.
Thanks Ladies,
Rochelle you have always had such a great way with words, thanks hun…
Heather, have you ever thought of moving out of state? Maybe just for awhile? I am loving it here in Ohio. You might think of the midwest as a boring conservative area, but the area I am living in is very liberal, and not boring at all. I think with your line of work that you can work from almost any place. Sometimes a drastic change can really help, even if the change is temporary. If you want to come out you can board with me for a little while, while you find your own place. Maybe Brandon and Theresa would get along well!:heartbeat: . Perhaps you could just come out for a visit to chek out the area, or get away, what do you think?
Sounds like a great Idea Marlene, but I really have no funds for such a thing. And I don’t want Brandon’s school to change “again” I want to keep him in this school till it’s out… then he will be moving on to middle school.
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